Early this morning, which was late late at night for me since I could not sleep and was still up at 5:30 (with an "O" in front of it), I checked out Facebook to see what Milley Cyrus memes I was missing or pictures of copulating goats my friends in Nepal or maybe Uzbekistan were posting about - because lets be honest, my life is incomplete without tracking every movement of dozens of swimwear models, rock bands, and strangers I accepted friend requests from because I needed to artificially augment my Facebook friend numbers so I could look important.
If I leave the damn thing alone for only one day I find that I missed out on at least three good jokes that make me laugh out loud, 14 anti-Obama posts, a dozen anti-right wing posts, three gay friendly posts, two posts warning that the"Mooslums" or the Illuminati or the Fish People are taking over America, a few friends who post how miserable their life is because of the shenanigans of their kids or how they hate their boss, traffic, the weather, their neighbors dog, or the mailman (yeah I don't get that one either), and hundreds of scantily clad women or memes about gun control, Navy Chiefs getting into trouble for not tucking in their gym shirts in public, and a large number of posts from friends trying to be motivating and a far less from some that actually ARE motivating. A random post or picture of someones new baby, grandkid, niece, car, TV, dog, kitten, or mistress. And of course the 150 Star Wars related posts every day that I MUST sift through because GOD forbid I miss out on any news of who is being cast as guy in background #6. Now you may be thinking that I am talking about your FB posts, please realize I am not talking about yours just everyone else's. Ok just kidding, actually I am talking mostly about the 300 pages I have "liked" over the last few years and now my news feed is being gang raped by memes, pictures, political statements, and pictures of dogs driving HMMWVs or shooting sniper rifles, of which I dutifully share more often than I should thus propagating the madness.
No wonder I can't sleep...I haven't checked my FB in at least 30 minutes.
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